Hong Kong to USA

Heading back to the US for the first time in over a year. I can tell because they confiscated my shaving cream at Narita before my connecting flight to Los Angeles. You know – because I might try to hi-jack the plane by … shaving everyone. WTF. I can’t help but think, if you take away everyone’s shaving cream, you won’t be able to distinguish the terrorists by their trademarked Jihad-a-Beards.

Alright, Pokemon just informed me that my connecting flight is ready to board. Land of Freedom, here I come!

American

11 responses to “Hong Kong to USA”

  1. ha-ha……You are right American. If they confiscate all the shaving cream, How to distinguish the terrorists. A bushy beard is almost be their brand in my opinion.

    I ever worked in another distant city and I can understand the joy of being home. Have a nice holiday at home American.

  2. “because I might try to hi-jack the plane by … shaving everyone” That’s a good one. 🙂
    Good luck and have a nice trip!

    ~Sieg

  3. One day to board a plane you must be naked, and go through a cavity search. I hope you are ready for those days, Mr. Mcgee.

  4. Hey, I’ll have you know that I was nearly shaved bald by a game developer on my last flight! I have no problem inconveniencing everyone on the off chance that it might happen again. It was so traumatic…. Besides, it will get everyone used to putting up with this kind of stuff. Next time an item needs banning, it will be much easier for them to do what they must do. And the shaving cream will be useful when they ban hair.

  5. Ideal plan for Islamist terrorists to blow up a commercial airplane:

    1. Pick white guys, or better yet white women (yes, there are white female Muslims), because white women have never ever done anything bad throughout the whole history of human existence.

    2. Implant simple chemical explosives into hollowed-out pseudo-suppositories (purified sodium, etc, I don’t know my bombs FYI). X-rays won’t pick them up since you’re allowed to “wear” a metal plate to cover up your oh-so-shameful privates, and it’ll be quite difficult for chemical scanners to work due to all the flesh and blood in the way.

    3. Assemble the bomb in a lavatory once the plane is in the air.

    4. Praise Allah for the destruction of the infidels, then react the chemicals to blow the whole place up sky-high (or down… the whole damn thing will most likely go straight down).

    “OH MAH GAWD A TERRORIST SUMONE CALL T3H HOMELAND SECURITY!!!)

    In all fairness, I’d rather live in America than in China, but that’s just me. At least over here you can talk crap as long as you’re not an Arab (since if you are one, you’d be ten times more susceptible to “probable cause”).

    Take white supremacists into consideration (not to be confused with white nationalists). They go off on marches with their rhetoric and propaganda, and they get police escorts.

    A bunch of Arab Muslim citizens publicly talk about killing Jews and white people (as opposed to the Aryan Resistance speeches of killing Jews and black people), and you get arrests and deportations.

    But I’m not an Arab, nor a Muslim.

  6. I had a couple flights about a month ago, and yet when boarding I had no negative experiences, even though I was carrying toothpaste, shaving cream, shampoo, and a hair-dryer in my carry-on pack. The only issue I had was with my laptop, which had to be checked. But that took about 2 minutes, and there was no issue there. And one of these checks took place at the Ronald Reagan Airport in Washington DC. I honestly don’t see why everyone is having issues while boarding their flights. Despite the plethora of complaints that seem to be filling the air, I haven’t had a single issue with my numerous travels during the last 5 years.

  7. You should garb one of the parachutes and jump when you’re above your airport. That’d be fun. Uh…yeah. Don’t listen to me. Lol. BTW, what’s the latest on the Alice movie?

  9. they never took my jar of brazilian wax when i went down under. weird.

  10. “You know – because I might try to hi-jack the plane by … shaving everyone. WTF.”

    There’s that hilarious cutting edge wit that made Bad Day LA such a critical hit.

  11. It’s a shame, you’d think with a unique first name of American that at least some terror suspisions would be waived. Be safe and welcome back to the land of scandal! 🙂

    Also, Mr. Sock above should stick a sock in it. How’s that for wit you egregious prick?

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